


A Heartbeat

by pft980811



Series: Heartbeats [1]
Category: Code Geass
Genre: Cancer, Does this count as underage?, M/M, yes heart cancer does exist
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-24
Updated: 2014-09-24
Packaged: 2018-02-18 14:58:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2352491
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pft980811/pseuds/pft980811
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU 17 yr old Lelouch and 10 yr old Suzaku. Lies can hurt a lot when the truth comes out. It hurts...so damn much. </p>
<p>"He then let their foreheads touch which caused them to look into each other's eyes. When he spoke, Lelouch felt his heart ache, with pain or happiness, he did not know."</p>
<p>I hope that, by the end, you understand how serious cancer is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Heartbeat

**Author's Note:**

> I only own the plot. The rest of this belongs to their rightful owners.

There were at least five other patients in the rather spacious room. Four had tubes attached to them and a few had an IV hooked into their skin. As the nurse led him to his own bed, the dark haired couldn't help but wear a sour expression on his rather handsome face. If it weren't because of the pissed off look that he had, the nurses and perhaps even some of the other patients would have tried flirting with the seventeen year old boy. When they finally reached his bed, the purple eyed patient sat down in it and completely ignored the nurse's sad attempts at flirting. Instead, he let his body shake as a coughing fit tore through him.

When he was done, the boy waved his hand dismissively. When the nurse was out of the room, the boy raised his wrist up to his face and read what was on his wrist band.

**Patient:** _Lelouch vi Britannia_

**Practitioner:** _Dr. Rakshata Chawla_

**Oncologist Diagnosis:** _SCLC;_

**Stage III Treatment:** _N/A_

Lelouch felt his heart falter a bit when he saw the "N/A" for "treatment". It seemed like his family has already given up on him. Now all he had to do was wait for the cancer to kill him. He had a feeling that he would be bored for a majority of that time.

…

By the third day, Lelouch could tell something was up. All the other patients seemed to talk more; wear actual smiles more often than they usually do. It was only when another patient was wheeled in did Lelouch realize what all the chatter was about. A little boy, maybe nine or eight was sitting in a wheel chair. He had brown curly hair and bright green eyes. He was being wheeled in by a nurse who was followed by two worried looking adults. The little boy wore a bright smile that matched his green eyes and Lelouch felt his sour face give a little.

But only a little and that was enough for Lelouch to feel even more guarded. Strangely, the teenager found himself becoming annoyed as the little boy began to greet everyone and the replies he got in return.

"Hi, Mr. Davis! How's your arm?"

"Oh, Suzaku! Welcome back! And my arm is doing better, thank you!"

"That's good! And Mrs. Cho, how is your scarf coming along? Have you finished it?"

Lelouch became even more annoyed when he found out that the little boy, this "Suzaku", was going to be taking the bed next to him. Instead of watching the little boy, Lelouch instead turned to his book. It was his fifth time reading the book but, much to his displeasure, he wasn't allowed to make any phone calls to his family so they could bring him a new book. That and he kind of figured that they had forgotten about him already. He then took note that the little boy's parents were being taken outside by one of the more eccentric doctors; Dr. Lloyd Asplund. The pale skinned boy remembered having many interesting conversations with the man about many different topics. Though he was interesting, Lelouch did not like the looks that the good doctor gave him. The kind that made him feel like the doctor wanted to dissect him and find out what made him tick.

Either way, when the boy's parents left the room, Suzaku's eyes turned towards the pale raven in the bed beside him with an excited gleam in his eyes. "Hi! My name is Suzaku Kururugi! What's yours?" it took Lelouch a full minute to realize that he was being talked to.

"Huh?"

Suzaku's childish laughter filled the room and Lelouch decided right there and then that he liked the boy's laugh and wouldn't mind hearing it again, subconsciously of course. Consciously, he still found the little boy annoying. "I said that my name was Suzaku and I asked for your name."

Lelouch turned back to his book while trying to push down the small blush of embarrassment that wanted to burn on his face. "Lelouch. My name is Lelouch."

Suzaku face scrunched up as he tried to pronounce the black haired boy's name. "Lelu-Lule-Lulu-! Argh! Why can't I say it?" Suzaku pouted a bit as he stuck his tongue in between his teeth and tried to pronounce "Lelouch". It was so adorable, a smile and a laugh escaped Lelouch before he could stop it. This in turn caused the struggling boy to stop pouting and turn towards his bed-neighbor with a smile. "What's so funny?"

Instead of answering the boy, Lelouch turned slightly towards him and made a show of pronouncing his own name. "Le-lou-ch."

Suzaku let determination shine through his eyes before he began to try and say it. So, with his tongue in between his teeth once more, the brown haired boy continued to try. "Leloo-Lula-Lala" Lelouch couldn't help but laugh at the frustrated expression on Suzaku's face. When he stopped, he noticed Suzaku staring at him with an awed expression adorning his face. The pale boy felt a blush crawl up his cheeks as he continued to look at the boy.

"W-what?"

Suzaku stayed quiet for a bit longer before answering his flustered neighbor.

"You're very pretty, Miss. Lulu." Lelouch felt his smile tighten and the muscle bellow his eye twitch.

…

For once in a great long time, Lelouch was alone in the huge room. Everyone, including the Annoying Suzaku, was out either getting some sort of treatment done or visiting some family members. It was rather nice.

No one to ask him annoying questions about his family or his favorite game or favorite color or whether he would like a scarf from Mrs. Cho or if he wanted to go play outside. It was completely silent.

And…rather lonely.

Though Lelouch wouldn't admit it, he was slowly becoming found of the little boy that slept in the bed next to his. The truth was, that everyone except Suzaku and Lelouch himself realized just how attached the two had gotten over the course of the single month that they had been together. They all noticed how, no matter how deep his nose was in whatever book he had, Lelouch was always paying attention to whatever Suzaku was saying or doing. Lelouch was actually the one to save Suzaku from a lethal overdose of his medicine. That had been an especially scary day. The other patients also noticed how Suzaku was constantly trying to get some form of Lelouch's approval. How he always asked Lelouch if the picture he drew was pretty or if that color matched this or if he spelled some word correctly. It was rather cute. The only thing that would make their friendship even cuter was if Lelouch would man up and give the green eyed cutie the time of day.

But all of that frustration would be over. As Lelouch began to contemplate whether or not he should call a nurse and ask if he could be taken outside, a nurse came wheeling Suzaku in. Lelouch couldn't help but stare at the sullen faced little boy. Lelouch, though he would never admit it, felt his heart drop to his stomach. He simply watched as the old nurse put the little boy in his bed and asked if he needed anything. For once, Suzaku stayed silent and merely shook his head. When the nurse left, Lelouch felt his self restraint go with her. He leaned forward and turned to the little boy completely. "What's wrong, Suzaku?"

Suzaku stayed staring down at his hands and didn't answer Lelouch's question. When the raven saw a tear trail down Suzaku's he felt himself immediately rise from his bed and move over to Suzaku's. Lelouch draped his arm over Suzaku's tan colored shoulders and he pulled the boy close. "Suzaku, what's wrong? Please…I'm worried…."

At this, Suzaku let out a little laugh. "I-I didn't th-th-think you c-ared a-about me…" Suzaku7 tried saying even though the hiccups were disrupting his sentence. Lelouch decided to mentally berate himself for hurting the little boy's feelings later. Instead, he sat awkwardly on the bed and tightened his grip on Suzaku thus pulling him closer.

"Of course I care about you. Now tell me what's wrong." Lelouch felt Suzaku tremble in his arms as he spoke.

"M-my-my m-mom a-and da-d die-die-died i-in a-a-a car-car crash. A-al I-I-I have is-is U-un-cle T-tohd-oh," Suzaku said before he completely collapsed into a sobbing mess. Lelouch numbly held onto the boy as he realized the gravity of the situation. The boy's father and mother has just died. The amethyst eyed boy vaguely remembered meeting the boy's uncle a week ago. He seemed like a nice man if a bit distant. "Lu-lu! W-what a-am I-I-I g-going t-to d-do!? I'm a-all a-alone!"

For a small, short moment, Lelouch was at a loss of words. Suzaku, the little boy that was always happy and making sure that everyone smiled, was now crying and asking him what he should do. It felt quite strange comforting the person who usually comforted him even if the boy did not know it. Before the crying Suzaku could mistake his silence for rejection, Lelouch moved over, brought the blankets over them and laid down with his arms wrapped around the shaking boy's body. He brought Suzaku's head closer to his chest and began to slowly pet his curly brown hair. "It…it's going to be okay, Suzaku. Everything will be sorted out. Don't worry. I'll always be with you. I won't leave you. Not for a second."

Suzaku stayed still for a bit longer, mostly from shock that the usually stoic Lelouch was comforting him, before he broke down completely. His tan, skinny arms darted out and wrapped themselves around Lelouch's skinny waist. "L-Lelouch!"

When the nurse came back a few hours later, she was surprised to see that Mr. vi Britannia was asleep with Mr. Kururugi in the latter's bed. She couldn't stop the small smile that appeared before she left the two alone.

… 

Lelouch watched with a smile adorning his face as Suzaku ran around the hospital's garden chasing a butterfly. The pale boy himself was sitting in the shade with Mrs. Cho. He had taken up her offer to teach him to knit just a week ago and, for some reason, he was enjoying it. He was creating a purple scarf for Suzaku and he planned to make a green one for himself in the near future. As he held up his creation, Lelouch stared at it with a critical eye before going back to work. I could probably finish it in another hour or so, he thought before taking another look at Suzaku and smiling. If there's no distractions.

Suddenly Suzaku was running towards him and Lelouch only had a split second to prepare himself for the impact. Thankfully, there never was one. When he opened his eyes and looked up, he was able to see Suzaku's smiling face as he looked down at him while holding himself against the tree with both his arms. Lelouch felt a smile cross his face before it turned into a sly smirk. The raven then poked a pale finger to the tan boy's open stomach which caused the boy to let go of the tree and hold the area that was poked. This caused the boy to fall into Lelouch's open arms with a laugh. Mrs. Cho couldn't help but laugh before getting up and walking away from the two. While she walked away Suzaku was getting tickled by the older boy until he couldn't breath. "Lu-lu-lu!" Lelouch let his smile fall a bit and pulled on an "angry" face.

"I thought I told you that my name was 'Lelouch' and not 'Lulu'!" the raven said before going back to attacking the little boy with his fingers. Suzaku let another round of shrieks fill the garden.

"I'm-I'm sorry! I-I pr-promise I-I-I won't do i-it again!" Lelouch, satisfied with his answer, stopped and merely leaned back against the tree while keeping his arms wrapped around Suzaku's narrowed waist. He let out an "oomph!" when Suzaku let his back fall against Lelouch's chest. They stayed there, enjoying the peaceful atmosphere.

"Lelouch," Suzaku said as he stumbled a bit over the name.

"Yes, Suzaku?"

Suzaku struggled into a sitting position and turned his body slightly to Lelouch so he could see those beautiful purple eyes. "Will you always stay with me? Until the day it all ends?"

Lelouch stared in surprise at the serious expression Suzaku held but his answer was no less serious.

"Of course, Suzaku. Right until the very end."

Then, almost as if he broke out of a trance, Suzaku let a smile adorn his face. "Great! And I'll stay with you!" Before Lelouch could say anything else, Suzaku leaned forward and pecked the side of Lelouch's cheek.

Lelouch could only stare in wide eyed surprise as Suzaku quickly got up and ran towards a flower bush. The raven felt happiness and confusion bubble in his chest as a blush spread across his cheeks. He couldn't decide whether he wanted to grab Suzaku and kiss him for all he's worth or run away into the safety of the nearest bathroom. Instead of doing either, Lelouch merely let his back fall against the tree trunk. He the turned away from Suzaku and began to knit once more.

He didn't get very far.

He heard a strained version of his name and this caused him to immediately jerk his head up. His heart almost stopped in his chest when he saw Suzaku kneeling on the floor and grabbing his chest like it hurt him. Lelouch, snapping out of his frozen stupor, scrabbled for purchase against the slightly damp grass, slipping a bit as he ran for the little ten year old boy.

"Somebody, help! Someone please help!"

He then turned back to the little boy in his arms after he made sure that a few nurses were heading their way. "Suzaku, stay with me. Come one, keep your eyes open." Before Suzaku could truly say anything, he was ripped from Lelouch's pale arms and rushed inside.

"Suzaku!"

…

Lelouch stared from the doorway with Tohdoh and took in the sight before him. There, in a bed and surrounded by tubes and IV's, lay a sleeping Suzaku. Lelouch was able to stay in the room while the doctor spoke about what was going on. And really, Lelouch felt like a fool for never digging deeper into Suzaku's reason for being in the hospital.

"It seems that Suzaku's cancer has finally caught up to him. I'm actually surprised he's gotten this far," Dr. Lloyd Asplund said as he stared at Suzaku's small body from where they stood. Lelouch, not really caring about, well, anything at the moment, asked Lloyd about what he was talking about.

"The boy has one of the rarest forms of cancer. He actually has heart cancer. At most, a single person a year dies from it. There is usually less than a point one percent chance of getting and dying from it." Lelouch felt anger tear through his heart as he rounded on Lloyd.

"Well then why haven't you been treating him!?" Lelouch said as he grabbed a handful of Lloyd's white coat. Even though he was usually quite weak, his fear, anger, and adrenaline gave him enough strength to actually kill Lloyd if he wanted to at that moment. Thankfully, Tohdoh was still stronger than the sickly raven.

"Lelouch, breath and let Lloyd explain," Tohdoh said as calmly as he possibly could at the moment. His voice was strangely calm but anyone could tell that, on the inside, he was completely panicking. Lloyd lightly glared at Lelouch before straightening out his jacket and turning back to look at Suzaku's barely moving body. "We could try chemotherapy but that could cause damage to the heart, thus killing him so we had to cross that off the list. There's also radiation therapy but if radiation is directed at or near the heart, it could cause damage to the heart muscles and increase the risk of coronary artery disease later in life so that option has been kicked out. There are also hormonal cancer therapies but the data shows that it increases the risk of heart disease. There are many other kinds of therapies but they all end in the same way."

Lelouch felt his heart sink even further. "So…no matter what we do…Suzaku is going to die…at age ten…from a tumor in his heart…"

Lloyd stayed silent before answering. "That seems to be the case since I doubt there will be anyone willing to die for Suzaku." This caused Lelouch to turn his head and look at the doctor who began to clean his glasses.

"What do you mean by that?"

Lloyd sighed before putting his glasses back onto his face. "I mean that there is a chance to save Suzaku's life…albeit a small one." After getting another glare from Lelouch, Lloyd continued. "We could give him a heart transplant but there must be a person who is willing to donate. That person must also be dead by the time we hold the operation since we need it to be fresh."

Lelouch couldn't help but stare at the doctor.Either way, Lelouch was going to lose the only bright spot of his life to a thing similar to the one he himself was fighting.

"C-could I just have a moment with Suzaku? Alone?" Lloyd turned and looked at Tohdoh before nodding.

The two left the room and Lelouch waited for only about five seconds after the door was closed before making his way over to the only chair in the room which was moved to an empty area beside the bed. Suzaku, almost as if he knew when Lelouch was near him, slowly opened his eyes and turned his head to the black haired boy. He slowly raised a tan hand up to his face and carefully removed the oxygen mask. "Hey, Lulu…" he said weakly.

Lelouch smiled lightly before taking Suzaku's other hand. "You said 'Lulu'." Suzaku winced before saying sorry. "Hey, Suzaku…?" The brunette let a confused expression fall onto his face before asking "what". Lelouch let his breath go before asking Suzaku for permission to go on with his plan. "Is it okay if I have your heart?" Suzaku stared at Lelouch before a grin broke out on his face.

"You've always had it, Lulu…" Lelouch felt his smile break, if only a bit, and tears began to fall down his face.

"Well then…can you please have mine?" Suzaku looked like he was about to burst with happiness.

"I…would be…so…happy, Lulu" Suzaku said with the brightest smile he ever had, not realizing that he has sealed both their fates with those words. Lelouch let a small laugh leave him before getting up and putting Suzaku's oxygen mask back onto his face. He then moved his head a bit forward and left a small, lingering kiss on Suzaku's forehead. He then let their foreheads touch which caused them to look into each other's eyes. When he spoke, Lelouch felt his heart ache, with pain or happiness, he did not know.

"Suzaku, never forget that I will always be with you. Until the day both of our hearts stop beating." Suzaku smiled before closing his eyes and nodding off to sleep. It would technically be the last day he ever saw Lelouch. Yet as he dreamt, all he could think about was the man.

When Lelouch fully closed the door he turned to both Lloyd and Tohdoh. "I am willing to donate. I will get into an accident if I have to, but there is a big chance that other people will get hurt so I rather we do this civilly." Lloyd and Tohdoh stared at each other before Lloyd looked back to the determined man in front of him.

"Congratulations," Lloyd said in a voice heavy with gloominess. "You have been selected for a heart donation."

…

At his request, Lelouch laid in the bed next Suzaku's while the numbing medicine made its way through both their bodies. Well, only Lelouch had the numbing medicine. Suzaku was actually the one being pumped full of sleeping stuff. It had been Lelouch's other request to be fully awake during the whole operation. He felt that, if he was going to die, then he wanted his last vision to be of Suzaku's life being given back to him.

As they were being led down the hallways to the operation room, Lelouch held onto Suzaku's limp hand. Even during the operation, he still held on even though his body was becoming weaker and weaker with every cut they made. The doctors, at his next request, laid their beds side by side. They even turned Suzaku's sleeping face to Lelouch and made sure that they were attached to each other the entire time. Lelouch was vaguely aware of watching them take his still pumping heart and moving closer to Suzaku with haste in their movements. He felt his consciousness leaving him even as they attached Suzaku's still heart to his dying body. Lelouch, as his vision began to darken, could vaguely hear a heart monitor beating normally while another stated to flat line. He surprised the doctors when he said his dying words.

"Suzaaakuuuuu…."

…

When Suzaku Kururugi woke he expected to see Lelouch beside his bed. Instead he saw his uncle, Tohdoh. While he searched around the room for a familiar dark head, he managed to awaken the sleeping man who began to cry while calling for his doctor. The rest of it all passed in a daze with only one question running through his head. When he was given the chance, he asked this question to both his uncle and doctor.

"Where's Lelouch?"

Tohdoh and Lloyd gave each other looks before Tohdoh kneeled down. He was going to tell the truth but his cowardice took over. "He left the hospital just yesterday. He got better enough to leave. I'm sorry Suzaku."

Ever since that day, Suzaku Kururugi hated Lelouch vi Britannia, not knowing the truth.

…

**Fourteen Years Later**

Suzaku stared at his boss, the principal of Ashford Academy, as he walked into the man's office. "Yes, sir? You wanted to see me?" The chunky man nodded before gesturing to the seat in front of his desk.

"Yes, coach Kururugi, please sit. I have a guest who asked for you. Please wait patiently for her." A twenty four year old Suzaku watched in surprise as the principal left his office. He remembered how he nearly had a heart attack when he heard that the man had wanted to see him.

A few minutes later the door opened and the sound of sharp, clacking heels soon followed. When Suzaku stood up, he bowed and spoke. "I'm guessing you are the one that wanted to see me?" when Suzaku raised his head, he was surprised to see a girl who couldn't have been older than a high schooler herself.

She raised a perfectly plucked eyebrow. "I don't know, are you Suzaku Kururugi?" Suzaku felt surprised at her rather…rude approach but he didn't retaliate in any way.

"Yes, I am."

The woman then smiled before making her way across the room and into the principal's chair. "Good, now I have a few questions to ask you." So do I, Suzaku thought but kept his mouth firmly shut.

"Did you have a rare form of cancer when you were around the age of eight to ten years old?" the girl asked. Suzaku felt his guard rise up but made sure to keep his body totally relaxed.

"Yes, I did."

The girl gave another smiling before bringing a note pad from her purse; making a check on the pad. "Did you go to St. John's Hospital for treatment?" Again, Suzaku said yes while becoming more suspicious of the conversation.

The mysterious girl's interrogation continued until one specific question made him snap.

"Did you by any chance know a seventeen year old boy there by the name Lelouch vi Britannia? He had Small Cell Lung Cancer and was treated there at the hospital as well." This single question made Suzaku shoot up from his chair and slam his hands on top of the desk. He completely ignored the two suited men that burst through the doors with guns in their hands. He merely glared down at the girl through angry eyes and, even though she had a pretty good poker face, he could tell that he had frightened her.

"Why the hell are you asking all these questions and what does Lelouch have anything to do with this?" The girl didn't answer Suzaku right away. Instead, she stood from the chair and made her way around the desk and to the still angry boy. He was shocked into silence when the girl wrapped her arms around him. "I've finally found you."

At this, Suzaku ripped himself away from her.

"What the hell are you talking about?" The girl looked at him strangely. "You don't know?"

"Know what exactly?" Suzaku replied angrily, feeling like he was missing something.

The purple eyed girl pointed to his chest while moving her sand colored hair to the side. "My big brother's heart is the thing that has kept you alive all this time."

…

Suzaku kneeled in shock in front of the grave stone. It was one of the millions of headstones that sat in the hospital's cemetery yet it is the only one Suzaku or Nunnally cared about. Nunnally. Lelouch's little sister. Lelouch.

Suzaku felt tears well up in his eyes as he realized the gravity of the situation. He had thought that his best friend and…perhaps…first love had left him…yet…

For the entirety of fourteen years, Suzaku held anger and pain in his—no…Lelouch's heart. He thought that the raven had left him behind and that those childish promises meant nothing to him, but, in reality, Lelouch had always been with him.

Suzaku put both hands on his chest and felt the heart there beating strongly. Nunnally had told him how their father had sent her away to a school in Paris and, during that time, Lelouch had developed Small Cell Lung Cancer. She apparently hadn't found out about it until a month after Lelouch had….

Nunnally said that she had been searching for him for a while now. Suzaku believed every word that she said.

Now she sat beside him and shed her own tears as she too stared at Lelouch's grave. She said nothing as she brought her bag closer and searched through it. When he felt something soft and warm against his skin, Suzaku looked down and saw a purple and green scarf being given to him.

"The purple one was meant for you but the green one was my brother's. I want you to have both of them." It was the sight of those scarves that made Suzaku break down completely.

He buried his face into the scarves and cried for all that he was worth, knowing that Lelouch's heart beat in his chest and his own heart lay still inside Lelouch's body six feet underneath him. Each heartbeat hurt yet…it made him feel closer to Lelouch. With each. And every. Heartbeat.

**LELOUCH VI BRITANNIA**

**12/05/1999 A.T.B.—07/10/2017 A.T.B.**

**LIVE, LAUGH, LOVE, HOPE, AND SMILE**

**Author's Note:**

> I had originally posted this on Fanfiction.net but then i decided that i want it to get a little more exposure. Please be kind.


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